A Very Long Hiatus... also, Arizona

So, I realize it has been a long, long time since I posted. Like several months. Such is the life of the law student (yes, I am still here and still trekking through). I think that this blog is something I will have to do when I am on vacation and working during the summer (i.e. when I don't have a million things to do at 5pm when I get home from school). In theory, once I have a regular job and am a full-blown "real person" (oh happy day when that happens. seriously.), I can blog more regularly after work, like I did when I was in New York.

So here is the Sparknotes version of my life in the last 5 or 6 months:

Went through OCI. Got two callbacks, no job offers. Spent the next several months looks for a summer job. Lots of straight-up rejections, lot of interviews and then no offers. Went through a mini-crisis in January re: being a lawyer again (not as bad as last year) because I wasn't finding a job and started freaking out that I had made a terrible mistake and would never be employable.

Found a job -- and a good job -- at DOJ in Washington, D.C. for the summer. WIll be unpaid, but what it lacks in funding I hope it will make up for in putting fancy things on my CV. And no, I cannot blog about my work this summer. As with last summer, the information is confidential.

Finished my comment for law journal. Almost didn't. Due to confidence crisis (see above), I starting doubting my ability to do it, or whether it was even worth it. Plus, all the time I thought I would have during the fall was taken up with trying to find aforementioned job. Was late with the first draft (real late), but ended up sticking with it and got it turned in. Am glad I did. Don't think it will get published due to the lateness issue, but c'est la vie. In a weird way, though, I think blowing that first deadline epically was good for me. I tend to be a rather type-A, uptight person, particularly about things like time and deadlines. I think growing up, I put a lot of pressure on myself in those respects, more than someone my age should have. To quote Ferris Bueller's Day Off, if you had stuck a lump of coal up my ass, in two weeks you would have had a diamond. Not that riding the ragged edge of irresponsibility like I did is really something I want to (or plan to) do again, but I think letting myself fail and blow something important off -- and seeing that the world didn't end when I did -- was good for my mental health. But, as they say, once is enough.

Didn't go home for Christmas. Parents came to Chicago instead. Then went to Michigan to visit my dad's family for the actual holiday. For a variety of reasons I won't get into. It was fun, because I had never experienced the Christmas season in Chicago before. But it was a little weird. I have never not been in California for Christmas, and it means that when I go to my parents' house for Spring Break tomorrow, it will have been like 8 or 9 months since I was last there. I guess it is just another sign that I am "growed up" and making an adult life for myself. I was even discussing with my mother when and how I should start thinking about packing up my room in California. Weird.

That's pretty much it. I still don't know where I am going to be after I graduate, and since I didn't land an OCI job, I doubt I will for a while.

But, I am not going to worry about that now. Right now, I am sitting on a deck in a hotel room in Scottsdale, AZ., where I rendez-vous'd with my parents before we head back home. Do you have any idea what it is like to go from a place that is like 30 degrees, grey, with freezing rain, to a place that is 80 degrees at night and clear skies, in a few hours? I am like dying over here. On the other hand, sitting by the pool reading was nice, and something I haven't done for about a million years. And I forgot that weather in March can *not* suck. So there's that.

In parting, I am leaving the following youtube clip. I feel like it goes with some of the sentiment in this post. And, it's an awesome song. I will continue to post a few times in the next two weeks, and then it will probably be radio silence again until my job starts in May. So without further ado:

Suck it, Chicago

There and Back Again: New York

Right now, as I am typing this, I am about 32,000 feet in the air. Specifically, on an American Airlines flight back to Chicago from New York. In less than a week, I will be on another American Airlines flight to New York; a day after that, I will be on a flight back to Chicago. The cause? Callback interviews.

I had a callback interview with a prominent New York firm earlier today. For those of you who do not speak law student, a "callback" interview is the second round of interviews for a summer firm job. Again, shades of sorority rush: after the first "round" of OCI interviews at the school, we minions will get invited (or not) by firms to interview again, this time in the specific office for which we applied, which for me was the New York office. All expenses paid, too. This, of course, is only if they liked you the first time around. Interestingly, the two (and so far only) callbacks I got were with the last two firms I interviewed with. So I guess, like a fine wine, I get better with time?

So, yesterday after my morning class, I headed over to the hell-place (also known as O'Hare International Airport), and got on a flight out to New York. Which was delayed. But since O'Hare is a vortex where timeliness goes to die, this was not unexpected. The flight was otherwise uneventful. Which is the best kind of flight, really. The one good thing about the lateness, though, was that I got to see a really cool sunset over the Manhattan skyline as we were landing. That was pretty sweet. I dunno-- just flying over New York and landing at the airport, seeing from the window all these things I had come to know this summer, I got really, really excited to be back. It was a very similar feeling to the one you get when you go home to see family after a long absence. So I think that says something about what I want, where I want to be. Also, thank god things in New York are open late. I was still able to get a real dinner. A city that never sleeps: My kind of town.

Also proving that my life actually is Groundhog Day, once in New York I found myself again in Times Square (seriously, why do I always end up in Times Square?), where the hotel was located (for a nostalgia connection, it was a hotel right across from the theatre where by boyfriend and I saw Porgy and Bess one of the times he came out to visit me while I was working in the city this summer). This was actually a logical placement, as the firm was located just off of Times Square, at 51st and 7th-- within walking distance.

The hotel was very nice-- très modern, suitably trendy. I wish I could say I got a decent night's sleep, but there was this really low like throbbing vibrating noise-- from whence it came I do not know-- that I could both hear AND feel in my bed. So that was weird. And prevented me from sleeping for a long while.

The actual interview was just OK. It got off to a kind of rocky start: I got to the building right on time, but then went to the wrong floor (the firm apparently takes up several floors, and when I saw this one guy get off at a lower floor with the firm signage, I assumed that was the floor. I was wrong, and ended up putzing on the wrong floor for several minutes, confusedly, until I was able to find someone to direct me upstairs. Needless to say, this made me a few minutes late to the interview, which is never a good way to start things out, and I felt like a putz. I wish there was a way to signal to people that my dingy-ness is really just confined to things like directions and mundane everyday life details, but doesn't translate into my work. When I am not in a focused "work" situation, I think I live in my head a lot, thinking about what I need to do, considering my work and obligations as I go about the day, and thus miss the everyday random life details. Like what floor to go to. Legally blonde, indeed.

Callback interviews are kind of like OCI interviews with a firm, on steroids. Instead of interviewing with one or two people at once, one time, you go through a succession of people-- in my case, four-- one at a time. The lawyers you meet with run the gamut from 2nd or 3rd year associates, all the way to partners. If you don't know what this means, don't worry, it is not really important. Seeing as how it seems unprofessional to go into details about the individual interviews on a blog (even an anonymous blog), all I will say is that I thought a couple of the interviews went well, a couple were a little more lukewarm. So we shall see how it all pans out. I am not really holding my breath, due to the wrong-floor snafu, but you never know. It's too bad too-- everyone I spoke with sung nothing but praises about the firm's work environment, like the fact that everyone cooperates with everyone and gets on with everyone, and are generally on friendly terms, not just professional terms. As one interviewer put it, there isn't really any "yelling." The cooperative and congenial atmosphere at Northwestern is something that I have really valued and benefited from as a student, and would love to work at a place that is similar. Alas.

After the interview, I went to a Starbucks and sat there for a couple hours doing work and taking a phone call for another project I am working on. After that, I had a couple hours to kill, so I putz'd around Hell's Kitchen for a while, checking out some of the indie shops. It wasn't a neighborhood I spent a lot of time in while I was in New York this summer, so it was nice to get to see a couple new things.

And now here I am, heading back to Chicago. We are in theory landing in like 40 minutes. Due to the nature of where I am seated and the internet on-board, I can't post pictures, but I did take some while I was walking around the city. When I get back to Chicago I will edit this post and add them. I have to say though, getting wifi on a plane is pretty baller. Even if I had to pay $10 for it.

Ah, New York City. Love to see you, hate to watch you go. Until next time... in about four days.

On a completely unrelated note, looking out my window to the left, I am seeing lightening over the horizon. This is not disconcerting at all...

Attack of the Moving Boxes

Moving officially sucks.

I imagine that this is not the most mind-blowing statement ever made, as I am pretty sure that every person at some point in their lives realizes this fact. But it is really, really unpleasant. I have moved before, but packing up a dorm room is very very different than packing up an apartment that includes all crap from said dorm room, plus many many other things picked up over the year that are needed for an apartment. Like furniture. And an entertainment system. And a piano/keyboard thing. Plus in addition to all of that, there is even more stuff, because we have all of my boyfriend's stuff as well. We have kind of been leisurely about packing (although I imagine that will change starting tomorrow, as D-Day is Thursday), so the apartment basically looks like a tornado went through it. Or a bomb. You get the picture. As someone who grew up in a very clean home, and tries to keep things at least somewhat orderly, I find this actually very distressing. It's like no matter what I do right now, I can't make the apartment look better. Or habitable. This for me is probably the worst part of moving.

And the packing just generally. Mostly because I am so sick of packing. Not two weeks ago, I had to pack up my dorm room in New York, including two boxes I had to ship ahead. Before that, I had packed, unpacked, and packed again to visit my parents in California. I feel like I spend my whole damn life packing and unpacking shit. And I am *so* over it. I suppose it is the nature of the point in my life that I am at, but this whole Bedouin-like existence of always being on the move is kind of getting old.

And yet I also miss being able to travel around. While the experience itself was kind of a mixed bag, one of the things I really miss about study abroad (I went to France during my junior year of college) was the fact that essentially, every other weekend I could hop on the high-speed train, and within a few hours, be somewhere entirely new. I didn't have to stay in one place; I could experience new fabulousness, new experiences so easily. This traveling and moving around though, is all kind of mundane. And just annoying. It's like I am settled in but not. It's funny-- right now I am going through OCI, which if I go down that path would both pay exceedingly well, but also really settle me in. Other than the fact that I haven't gotten any callbacks so I probably won't happen, if I do go down that road, I will be a long ways towards settling into a very stable life. Finally. But I am also not sure I want that kind of stable life at this point. When I came to law school, I did so with visions of working in a legal field that allowed me to go new places, experience new things, meet interesting and important people, engage in an active and worthwhile employment. I thought I'd spend my third year abroad, getting a joint degree from a foreign country's law school. All that seems kind of far away now. I guess I am feeling like I am too young to be boring. Curse you, Season 1 finale of How I Met Your Mother (my boyfriend has gotten me watching courtesy of his Netflix streaming account).

Well anyways, for now it is on to bigger and better things (and by that I mean a nicer apartment. With a ceiling fan, apparently). On an unrelated note, I am feeling really guilty that I haven't yet signed up for a PAWS volunteer session; but, I am moving... and OCI...so just, no. :( Also, I finally finished my last project from work (clocking in at 94 pages, bitches)!! So I can finally say I am a free woman...for about two weeks, until classes start. Oy.

Until the next update...

It's the Beginning of the End

Today was my last day of my internship. Technically I am not done, because I need to finish a project (as it would be a shitty thing to just not finish something). But still, last official day of work. Turned in my security badge and all. Really kind of sad. I have enjoyed this summer, and have enjoyed being a "working girl." Much more fulfilling than being a student. In all, it was a great experience, and extremely eye-opening. I still can't believe some of the things I have seen, that people really act like the (we think--we would be wrong) exaggerated criminals we see on TV. I hope that one day this can be my life. Tiring, a lot of work, but fascinating. Particularly once you get into court, which happens a hell of a lot more often in the public sector than in private practice.

At any rate, I have to finish this project. I probably should have worked on it tonight, but I was just so tired from the week, and staying up late every night. Will work on it tomorrow, hopefully finish. Then I will have to decide what I want to do for the next few days, before I leave New York. Depending on the weather, I think I am going to try to hit Coney Island on Monday or Tuesday. I am a sucker for amusement parks, and it is a fairly big New York "thing" to do (incidentally, I went to Central Park over the weekend to go on the carnival rides, but upon closer look...they really are just kind of kiddie rides. I am more of a throw-em-up-spin-em-around kind of gal, so it didn't really cut it and I didn't go on. Rather disappointing). I may also try to hit up the Bronx Zoo and the Aquarium...but I am kind of terrified of the Bronx. Although, given what has been going on in Chicago lately (namely, violent "flash mobs" of ghetto kids beating up on people in the tourist areas), maybe the Bronx is safer. Except not really.

I got my On-campus interview schedule today. For those of you not in the legal field, OCI is an annual ritual that all rising 2Ls go through before the start of the year, to determine if they will be going to work at a "Biglaw" firm in the summer after their second year (and, assuming a job well done, an offer for permanent employment upon graduation and successful completion of the Bar exam). I exclusively applied to firms in New York and Washington, DC. Which lead to an interesting conversation with my boyfriend. Jesus this thing is basically Sorority Rush, except with suits and not cocktail dresses. As per NALP guidelines (don't ask), I don't think I can (and really shouldn't anyway) go into details at this stage; suffice it to say that there are several days of going to multiple 20-minute interviews with representatives of the different organizations. Which is also basically the definition of sorority rush, at least at Northwestern. Well, at least I have good practice.

Man, I can't believe it is only a few more days. Sad. I really like New York; I am sad to see it go. I am sad to see myself go. I will be updating the blog about my final days in the Big Apple. I will also blog (probably tomorrow) about what I did last weekend; was going to tonight, but too tired.

Anyway, in tribute to the fun (and sometimes challenging), and ultimately rewarding times this city has given me over the last couple months, here is a YouTube video of Empire State of Mind. I listened to this song when I found out I would be in NYC for the summer, so it seems fitting for the twilight of my time here. Enjoy.

I also need to locate a shipping box, packing tape, and some packing padding. I bought some stuff while I was here, but considering I was already maxed out on my weight limits flying out here, will need to send things ahead to Chicago. Plus, I am not sure I could physically fit anymore into what was already in my suitcases. Here's to hoping there is a UPS store or something.

And finally, some random thoughts I had today, that I thought were interesting enough to share:

First, some professor at U.C. Riverside is getting five million dollars to study ("scientifically") if there is life after death. Uh, pretty sure you can't really prove that one there, Skipper (in a factual sense, not talking faith here people). Unless this guy knows something we don't, we don't even have the technology it would take to cross whatever physical and temporal dimensions stand between our life and eternity, if such an eternity or afterlife even exists. Sylvia Brown's contentions aside, there is no real way for us to access the "other side" without croaking ourselves, at which point it would then be impossible to furnish physical (non-ghost-like, which doesn't last anyway) evidence of such an existence to the living. Aka, it's impossible. I am all for humanities getting funding (because it *all* goes towards like, pharma research), but couldn't it go towards something more realistically obtainable?

Second, (and this is real random-- thought of it while I was reading an article about STDs. Don't ask. And no, I don't have any) but have you ever noticed that a disproportionate number of creative geniuses (or "geniuses" in other, non-IQ type ways) back in the day had syphillis? I'm serious. There is a lot of scholarly research that while perhaps already gifted, people like Van Gogh and Beethoven reached the height of their genius while under the peak influence of syphillis' influence. Right before they descended into madness and death. If guaranteed to produce the next Ode to Joy as a side effect of the illness's brain-screwing, would someone willingly get syphillis? Despite people's probable initial reaction of "hell-to-the-damn-no," I don't think it is necessarily as obvious a "no" as people might first think. While somewhat extreme, what's the old saying, "it's not the years in your life, but the life in your years?" Not that I want to run out and get a nasty STD, but it does make you think. Creating a lasting piece of genius, or changing the world, is -- so far as we know anyway-- the only real way to achieve any kind of immortality. Making your mark lets an individual "live on" by having a place in the world's collective memory. Look at the ancient Egyptian pharaohs: they built those tombs now on display for all the world to see, and underwent elaborate burial practices so that they could forever live on after death in a new world. And through our knowledge and study of them through the elaborate and intentionally-preserved artificats they left behind, in a way, they have.